Lirieke: Hannah Montana. Lily Do You Want To Know A Secret? Script.

Hannah Sings (this is the life)

Host: fourteen year old sensation, Hannah Montana continues her smash tour with another Sold out show tomorrow night in L.A.
[This is the life]

Robbie: Whoa did you hear that sold out in L.A! Whoa!
Farmain: Ow Ow needle in finger sharp shooting pain.
Hannah: oh I'm sorry Farmain.
Farmain: ah its ok I kiss it all better!! Alright. aww look at you you look gorgeous!! your gonna look beautiful in the finale. Do it with me come on now. work it out work it out and pop it! oh! cushy tear awkward moment time to go. dont look at my booty!!
Robby: ah no danger there partner.
Farmain: I love you hannah montana .
[hannah waves]
Jackson : Do you mind i am on the phone here. Alright. i've got a life to you know and i would appreciate it if i could get through one conversation without hearing the words \"hannah montana \" [on phone] yea thats right girl i know hannah montana . and i've got to incredible tickets for tommorow night. great ill see you then. [hangs up]
[to miley] i need to incredible tickets for tommorow night.
Hannah: Sorry im sold out.
Jackson : Dad.
Robby: hey think about it this way miley. he goes out with the girl they fall in love they get married he moves out.
Hannah: You've got the tickets!!
[phone rings]

Miley: Hello?
Lily: hey its me landing in 20 seconds!!
Hannah: Great!! [hangs up] Lily alert in 18 seconds!
Jackson :shes your best friend miley sooner or later your gonna have to tell her your hannah montana .
Miley: i pick later.
Robby:9 seconds get the juice.
Miley: got it!!
Robby: good. three.
Jackson : two.
Miley: one!!
Lily: guess who just landed two tickets to the hottest concert in town. miley! you and i, i being your best friend are going to see the one the only...HANNAH MONTANA !! Whoa!! your not screaming...WHY ARNT YOU SCREAMING!!
Jackson : oh believe me shes screaming on the inside!!
[scream played mouth closed]
{later at school}
Lily: i just dont get it. why wont you go to the concert with me?
Miley:its just that umm i really wanna spend some quality time with my brother.
Lily: quality time with your brother?? Ok If your not gonna tell me I guess theres nothing I can do except go through life wondering what I did to deserve being hurt so badly by my best-
Miley interrupts: Oh stop I just can't go ok?
Lily: Ok that's fine
Johnny: Hey Miley hows it going
(lily pokes miley)
Miley: uhm pretty good, just getting some ketchup for my veggie burger I see you like mayonnaise never tried that on a veggie burger and maybe I should but not today because I have ketchup on the
Lily interrups: Miley, Miley MILEY!
Miley: you know, what a lot of people don't know is its.. its also a wonderful moisturizer here isnt that lovely?
Johnny: Moisturizer right.. your pretty funny.. oh wow my hand does feel softer
Lily: wow
Miley: I know he is soo hot and im so lame
Lily: hey hes the one who belived that ketchup was a moisturizer, Miley you've been totally crushing on johnny collins for months, he thought you we're funny this is your chance hes sitting right there lets move!
Miley: I just can't do it
Lily: yes you can, Miley your smart, your funny and you're totally cute, and now, you have my lucky bracelet
Miley: ok
Lily: WAIT! Bugger check
Miley: you are so gross
Lily: All clear, good to go
Amber (take miley and lily's seats): Hey Johnny
Lily: Hey Amber? we we're gonna sit there!
Amber: well isnt that too bad? but don't worry, there are seats over there by the trashcan
Amber: At the losers table
Miley: Uhmm hey amber, I think it might be time to pluck the stashe'
Lily: and ambe is that a zit or are you getting another head!
Miley and Lily: GROSS! [our handshake]
Lily: ok we didn't get those seats, minor set back but the good news is we have better seats for hannah montana
Miley: Im sorry but its just that.. I don't like hannah montana
Lily: What?
Oliver: Hey baby how you doing? Oliver Oken and may I say you two are smoking
Amber: In your dreams!
Oliver: im counting on that! Hey slick! Hey! Oh yea she wants me!
Lily: Oliver you're not gonna belive this, Miley says she doesn't like Hannah Montana!
Oliver: WHAT! Hannah montana is a goddess! I worship at her feet, in fact FYI one day im going to be Mr. Hannah Montana. Gonna watch her every minuet of every day,Protect her from any obssessed fans, every night I'll shampoo and condition her beautiul blonde hair.
Miley: Oliver, I say this because I care about you? GET SOME HELP!
Lily: Miley don't make me go to see my favorite singer without my best friend, if you don't take this ticket I'll end up going to the concert with ?Mr. Hannah Montana?
Oliver: YOU HAVE AN EXTRA TICKET TO HANNAH MONTANA ! That was really loud wasn't it?
{back at Mileys House}
Jackson: Hey dad, im really nervous about my date, well im just gonna come out and say this- There is no body in the world whos advice I trust and respect more than yours
Robbie: Son, Im not loaning you any money
Jackson: What! What? Is that what you think this is about? Dad, Dad I am hurt, This has nothing to do with borrowing money, I was actually kinda hoping for more of an out rat gift.
Robbie: I gave the gift a lot son, Don't push it! Hunny what happened?
Miley: Hannah Montana happened!
Robbie: you mean the kids at school found out?
Miley: No this was just about I ticket to see Hannah Montana. What if they found out I was Hannah Montana? No body would treat me the same!
Robbie: I bet Lily would
Miley: Are you kidding? Shes hannah's Biggest Fan! If she knew the truth, ive never be just miley again
Robbie: Oh baby doll
Miley: Im going to take a walk on the beach
Robbie: Now hold on just a minuet First lets get this french fry out of your hair before the seagulls attack you, boy that sucker is really in there too. Second of all, I know your concerned that if Lily finds out that she wont treat you the same but shes still your best bud.Now, you need to trust her. At least think about telling her.
Miley:Ok????????. NOT GONNA HAPPEN!
Jackson: Dad, I can only hope that when im a father I can give my kida
Robbie interrupts: No money!
Jackson; didn't think so
{at the concert}
[this is the life]
Hannah: THANK YOU LOS ANGELES!
Hannah: Hey Joh-Just another fan
Johnny: Uhmm hi can you make this out to Johnny, its not me its my brother he really likes you, not that I don't, cuz I do but you know its he wanted me to get it, so im getting it. Yea if so you could just sign that to Johnny, my little brother.
Hannah: there ya go hey! Really soft hands
Johnny: Thanks its ketchup I mean bye!
Robbie: Sorry guys! Make sure to pick up a record and I t-shirt in the lobby.
Hannah: He is so CUTE!
Robbie:Hunny at your age theres only 2 things that are cute and that's squirells and little puppy dogs. Whoo! I tell ya what, I hate wearing this thing, its like kissing your great aunt Clara Hey great show tonight, I'll go get the limo. Your momma would have been so proud of you.
Hannah: thanks daddy
Lily: HIGHER OLIVER IM ALMOST IN!
Oliver: There is no higher your already standing on my head!
Lily: Jump you idiot! Jump! Whaa! Whaa!! Oops! Wha. And she sticks the landing! Hannah Montana's Hot Dogs! Hannah Montana's scarf! HANNAH MONTANA ! AHH!
Hannah: Who ever you are you have to get out of here right now! Or I'll call security
Lily: Wa-Wait! No im sorry I was just looking for a souvenir my name is Lily Truscott and im a HUGE fan.
[hannah sticks her face in pie]
Lily: Did you just shove pie in your face?
Hannah: Its not a real pie! It's a foaming facial wash?pie.
Lily: What's wrong with your voice?
Hannah: Uhm that happens after every concert
Lily: You give so much! I just wish Miley were here
Hannah: Miley? Who's Miley? I don't know a miley? That's a strange name.
Lily: Oh shes my best friend!
Hannah: Right well then why don't you go get her?
Lily: Oh great idea! I'll call her!
Hannah: NO! you know cell phones don't really work in it here it has to do with the walls and cement and [phone rings] Ok ? they must've fixed it!
Lily: Aren't you gonna get that?
Hannah: Uh Uh no! I'm talking to you that would be rude! OK shes not home!
Lily: Wow that was weird
Hannah: Uh why don't I just give you an autograph for her?
Oliver: What about me! Im the one who loves you! Your much paler in person.
Hannah: Yea I am you know what? Gosh it was really fun meeting you guys but I really gotta go.
Oliver: Wait! Can't I atleast shampoo and condition your beautiful blonde hair?
Hannah: No but you can take this towel
Oliver: Hannah Montana's Towel! [oliver falls] It's ok! None of my blood got on the towel!
Lily: Well, I guess im leaving too.
Hannah: Ok!
Lily: Without even a towel as a souvenir
Hannah: Buh-Bye
Lily: nothing but my memories that will fade, too too quickly!
Hannah: Alright! Alright! Here!
Lily: OMG! The actual scarf you wore on the actual stage! I cant belive! Hey! I have a lucky bracelet like that I loned it to my best friend yesturday, of course mine says lily on the back? just like that.
Hannah/Miley: Tada! Lily I know your upset that I didn't tell you but you cannot just freeze me out like that. Please talk to me.
Lily: I thought we we're friends, I thought we told each other everything but I guess I was wrong cuz u kept just the biggest secret in the world Miley Stewart/Hannah Montana!
Hannah: Ok? other than that? did you enjoy the concert?
Jackson: That's right? I happen to be real tight with hannah montana.
Jackson's Date: cool, can't wait to meet her
Jackson: Hey Hannah I thought my lady here could use a little souvenir.
Hannah: Jackson GET OUTTA HERE!
Jackson: ?. For you! Told ya we we're tight
Jackson's date: Thanks? I guess
Lily: I am so out of here
Hannah: Lily please wait! I wanted to tell you its just that? I was afraid
Lily: Afraid of what?
Hannah: I don't know? maybe once you knew you won't want to be my friend anymore and you'd like Hannah Montana more than me.
Lily: That's what you thought? That could never happen Miley. Don't you know that?
Hannah: Yea I do. Ok no more secrets and to prove it I'm going to show you something I've never shown any other friend.
{At Miley's house}

Miley: Wait till you see this?
Lily: Why am I standing in your closet?
Miley: Because behind my closet is?..My Closet!!
Lily: It's like a dream! A beautiful beautiful dream! Ok dreams over! I've got to have these!
Miley: Wait there's more!
Lily: ANOTHER CLOSET? What size shoe do you wear?
Miley: I'm a six
Lily: I'm a seven but I'll squeeze! Wait till Amber finds out!
Miley: What?
Lily: Well we have to tell them! Use my cell. Take a picture o me in front of Hannah Montana's Clothes!
Miley: NO! no one else can see this stuff!
Lily: Are you crazy! Why not?
Miley: Once people know I'm Hannah they won't treat me the same!
Lily: That's the point! I'm talking mega popularity for both of us! Think about Johnny Collins. He'd be yours if he knew!
Miley: NO!
Lily: How can you be so selfish? If you we're really my best friend you'd want this for me!
Miley: If you we're really my best friend you'd understand why I can't do it.
Lily: Come on cut me some slack Hannah!
Miley: Hannah!?! I knew this would happen!
Lily: Did I say Hannah? I didn't mean that! It was a mistake!
Miley: No the mistake was trusting you!
Jackson: That girl tonight really dug me dad. I think it was the guns!
Robbie: Hey Lily, I think things are going to be a lot better around here now that you know our little secret.
Jackson: Did you see the way she ignored you? I'm sorry but that is no way to treat a man with your compassion and sensitivity
[Robbie puts whipped cream in Jackson's mouth]
Jackson: Still no money?
Miley- I am so MAD! [Miley eats Robbie's sundae]
Robbie: So you're gonna take it out on my ice-cream sundae? Do you want to talk about it?
Miley: NO!
Robbie: ok?. you had a fight danana, she made you mad, and now you sit and stuff your face you got the process sugar bluesss
Miley: That has to be the worst song you've ever written!
Jackson: She obviously doesn't remember the potty training song
Jackson and Robbie: I like to sing I like to dance but I can't do it with poopy in my pants!
Miley: DAD! This is not funny! Everything that I thought would happen happened! She found out who I was and now its ruined everything!
Robbie: You don't know that for sure milez, Things will change, just give it some time. GROUP HUG!
Miley and Jackson: Gotta go

(Thanks to Joseph for these lyrics)